Can you help decipher a puzzler?

[MiloMinderbinder]

My mate and I were debating some of the great mysteries of life the other day. Topics ranged from "what happened to Lord Lucan", "The Loch Ness Monster - fact or fiction", "Nazi Gold and the Swiss banking system", "Can individuals make a difference to the environment or are they an easier target than corporations" and of course the old chestnut " were the Inca lines a result of first contact with an alien species", We successfully extrapolated the truths, half-truths and misinformation from the above topics but then my mate came up with a real corker;


Jermaine Jenas - why?

We would be interested to hear your views on this mystery of the world, apparently the greatest minds at Harvard and Oxford are combining to create a theory on this matter, early indications are that the result is something like this;

talent + pace - attitude + pay packet - achievement - motivation/loyalty = Jenas

[Gino Ginelli]

Jenas is a result of the narrow minded and restrictive sporting development in this country. In the UK if you're big you play football or rugby. If you can run you can play football or Rugby. If you lazy you can play cricket. Other sports such as Tennis/Atheltics etc are not supported or developed enough in this country.

As a result Jermaine Jenas, who should be running the 400/800m for Great Britain, is just a footballer, who is tall, can run, but can't kick a ball straight. Peter Crouch should be playing Basketball, yet is the most absurd CF ever. And because we're limited like that, the basic player selection in British footy is 'big & can run."

THAT is the reason for Jermaine Jenas.

[spurs61]

I refer you to my post some months ago. We established that Young-Pyo is the Korean word for an inexcusable mistake. We further agreed that Mr Lee was bred in a laboratory to show all Korean citizens what a Young-Pyo really looks like and serves as a warning to all.

It has now become apparent that Jermain was also bred under strict lab conditions, however something went badly wrong (Young-Pyo'd) and the result was a mutant ****-up without parralel in human history....Jenas. It is said that the Premier League has insisted that Jenas MUST be bought by any team with delusions of granduer (Forest, Barcodes and now Spurs) as a means of keeping the "Big Four" in Champions League football and thereby ensuring that English football is envy of the world. The theory being that any side other than the big four will be humilated by their opponents (see Everton) and thus devalue the Premier League brand.

I think that answers your question.

[choda]

I refer you to my post some months ago. We established that Young-Pyo is the Korean word for an inexcusable mistake. We further agreed that Mr Lee was bred in a laboratory to show all Korean citizens what a Young-Pyo really looks like and serves as a warning to all.

It has now become apparent that Jermain was also bred under strict lab conditions, however something went badly wrong (Young-Pyo'd) and the result was a mutant ****-up without parralel in human history....Jenas. It is said that the Premier League has insisted that Jenas MUST be bought by any team with delusions of granduer (Forest, Barcodes and now Spurs) as a means of keeping the "Big Four" in Champions League football and thereby ensuring that English football is envy of the world. The theory being that any side other than the big four will be humilated by their opponents (see Everton) and thus devalue the Premier League brand.

I think that answers your question.

Funny. But I still maintain Lee is a right back. He is an astute defender with good positional sense, no matter how bad he is at crossing with his left foot.

Jenas has got to be the poster boy for the dismal FA coaching set up.

Did you see Craig Johnson's comments about the FA coaching? What a ****ing legend. He knows exactly what he's on about and he's not afraid to stand up and say it either.

[Gino Ginelli]

It has now become apparent that Jermain was also bred under strict lab conditions, however something went badly wrong (Young-Pyo'd) and the result was a mutant ****-up without parralel in human history....Jenas. It is said that the Premier League has insisted that Jenas MUST be bought by any team with delusions of granduer (Forest, Barcodes and now Spurs) as a means of keeping the "Big Four" in Champions League football and thereby ensuring that English football is envy of the world. The theory being that any side other than the big four will be humilated by their opponents (see Everton) and thus devalue the Premier League brand.

So what dastardly conspiracy is behind his continual selection in the England national squad? A cracking line in blow-jobs? 'Cos he must be sucking someones dick...

[MiloMinderbinder]

So what dastardly conspiracy is behind his continual selection in the England national squad? A cracking line in blow-jobs? 'Cos he must be sucking someones dick...

I can help on that one; it comes down to the FA rule no. 6.66 - "there shall always be at least one player included in every England squad who shall be anonymous at best, thereby providing endless topics of debate for the great unwashed. Examples in the modern era are, Dublin, Dion; Rickets, Michael; Walcott, Theo, Smith, Alan..."

[Gino Ginelli]

Palmer, Carlton.

[choda]

Ah yes, the worst player to have ever played for England.

Or is that title reserved for Ricketts or Gardner?

I'm going for Ricketts.

[mjbmedia]

Dixon, Lee, Thomas ,Geoff

[choda]

They weren't so bad, were they?

Dixon won a lot of medals. He can't have been an awful defender. Can't have been anywhere near as bad a player as Ricketts who is struggling in the lower divisions at the age of 25 (approx).

And Geoff Thomas was regarded well as a Tainio type, wasn't he?

[hastingsyid]

I refer you to my post some months ago. We established that Young-Pyo is the Korean word for an inexcusable mistake. We further agreed that Mr Lee was bred in a laboratory to show all Korean citizens what a Young-Pyo really looks like and serves as a warning to all.

It has now become apparent that Jermain was also bred under strict lab conditions, however something went badly wrong (Young-Pyo'd) and the result was a mutant ****-up without parralel in human history....Jenas. It is said that the Premier League has insisted that Jenas MUST be bought by any team with delusions of granduer (Forest, Barcodes and now Spurs) as a means of keeping the "Big Four" in Champions League football and thereby ensuring that English football is envy of the world. The theory being that any side other than the big four will be humilated by their opponents (see Everton) and thus devalue the Premier League brand.

I think that answers your question.

lmfao...........................................